Being a parent we all want to give the best to our children. Parents do hard work to fulfil their children’s needs, whether it’s about their education at city’s best school or buying the best things for their living. Parents never compromise with it. But we all know that raising a child has never been easy. Parents are children’s first teacher from where a child forms the base of his image and behaviour.
Your child doesn’t know anything and he always thinks that his parents are the best teacher for him. Whatever you will do in front of him will be his teaching and lessons. For instance, in the initial five years, your child will learn how to speak. He will try to say everything which he hears from the people around him. Your child will often try to imitate you. He will copy your words, behaviour and habits; whether it’s good or bad. That’s why children are considered as their parent’s mirror.
Therefore, we as parents are responsible for our children’s good and bad habits. In this piece, we are going to cover those things which we shouldn’t perform in front of our children, so that, they don’t develop bad habits for the rest of their life.
Here we go with the top 10 list of don’ts. Which a parent shouldn’t do in the front of his child:
- DON’T USE FOUL LANGUAGE: Children often pick their parents words very quickly, especially when they are learning to speak i.e. first 5 years. It absorbs information with its senses to explore the unknown world. So, when you are around your children. Don’t use any foul & cuss words in your language, because you never want your kid to use the wrong language outside with his friends and others. The bad language of your children will be a reflection on parent’s teachings. So, be careful about your language.
- DON’T COMPARE THEM: Parents often compare their children with their siblings and friends. It actually brings down the self-confidence and moral of your children. They will feel like; they are good at nothing. Slowly but steadily self-doubt will grow. They may also generate the negativity for the upcoming challenges. Comparing your children with someone else can make your child jittery. The relationship between parents and children can get damaged. So, being a responsible parent, your job is to encourage your child at every step they take, rather than reminding that who else is ahead of them.
- DON’T CRITICIZE THEM IN PUBLIC: Criticizing your child in front of others is the worst thing that you could do to your child. If you criticize your child in front of his friends & others, he will get discouraged and can lose his self-esteem. Parents always forget while nagging and criticizing their kids that they also have feelings, which they are crushing. Parents must know that the goal of criticism is to educate, not to punish & embarrass their child. Always try to take a gentle approach and talk to your child in private. So, he can get to know that you respect his feelings and understand him.
- AVOID PHYSICAL ABUSE: Any sort of physical abuse is a definite NO. Not just your child, never beat your spouse or servant or whosoever it is. Your child will learn that violence is the best option to get rid of his anger.
Your child may generate a severe fear of getting into relationships. Later on, it will take a very long time to get this fear out of him. Next time, when you are going to have such a condition, which can let you get in fights & violence, sit down and try to take help to solve it in a more mature way.
- AVOID PUBLIC DIPLAY OF AFFECTION: It is a bad idea to getting romantic when your child is around. It is considered as one of the biggest reasons for children hitting puberty at their very early age. Nowadays our children are getting sexually explicit content very earlier, from movies, TV, internet, etc. Parents think that their child is too small to understand this, but they are wrong. However, physical contact shouldn’t be completely eliminated, because your child will learn to show love, affection, and empathy from you. So, feel free to hug your partner or cuddle once a while.
- AVOID YELLING: Sometimes parents get frustrated due to their lack of sleep and bad physical health. Try not to scream and shout in front of your children. You may think they are too small to understand the exact words that you speak. But your child picks up the tone and anxiety from your voice, faster than you expect. Your child thinks that it’s about him and assumes that you’re upset because of him. He may generate fear of you, which can affect your relationship with your child.
- NEVER IGNORE YOUR SPOUSE: Parents usually gets in the situation of misunderstanding and fight with each other. Sometimes they ignore each other in front of their child. You should make sure that your child doesn’t get involved in it. Because your child is noticing everything, the minute you try to ignore or avoid him or your spouse. Your child is probably going to learn the same nature from you. He will also start disrespecting others in the same way in which his parents’ disrespect and avoid each other. You can discuss your misunderstanding silently when your child is out of earshot.
- AVOID DRINKING & SMOKING: Drinking and smoking in front of your children can set a bad example for them. Several studies have proven that when parents drink and smoke in front of their children, their kids don’t consider drinking and smoking as a harmful thing. Your bad habit can unwillingly get transferred in your innocent child. They may start consuming these things at a very early age. Therefore, from the next time, when you’re going to drink and lose control in front of your children, remember that you are the responsible actually person for your children. Kindly act responsibly.
- STOP BRIBING: Rewarding your children to make them obey your words is not a good parenting practice. The children shouldn’t get a reward for every right thing they do. If you’re bribing to make your child learn good things, then it means you are not a responsible parent. You have to understand that, they should learn to do the right things on their own, by understanding it. If you are making a deal with them to do it, it means you are a desperate parent who is just making his child obey him instantly.
- AVOID EXCESS SCREEN TIME: Excess screen time can lead your child to get sleeping (insomnia), obesity, and behaviour problems. You should yourself lessen your own screen time in front of your children. Children adopt every single characteristic from their parents and surrounding. If you read a book in front of them, they are most likely to do the same. So, start doing good things in front of them and avoid excess screen time for their good mental and physical health.
Also, digital media is a powerful learning aid and should not be discarded completely. But do watch what your children are spending time on. If they are watching something useful, let them. Even better is if they are using some digital aid to actually create something. Creation is the highest form of learning.